Airport Hell

Right, so going to Guam I learned several things:

1) Just because you have a reservation and you’re told everything is GTG, don’t count on it. I showed up at the airport only to find that my ticket had not actually been purchased. Sorry Karl, this one is one you, we will reimburse you later…

2) Narita Airport, the major international airport in Japan, just outside of Tokyo, the King of Electronics, the “We install monster sized PV solar panels to save the earth” airport does not have any internal wireless network aside from the Executive suites where you are issued a name and password. As if I really want to be a part of that uber-elite wireless network anyway. Screw them and their “you will never know the joys of what’s behind these doors” selves. Just give me some peasant class wireless to go with my peasant class economy ticket. I’ll plug the damn thing into the network if I have to, just give me a place to do it. Oh yeah, they also don’t give you anywhere comfortable to sit down and wait when your flight is delayed 5 hours past the scheduled departure time.

3) Did I mention the screaming herd of kids sitting right behind me, right now? Anyone have a stun-gun? Where is security to drag these brigands to the bowels of the airport? Oh yeah, probably hassling some 65 year old grandmother with a brick of cheese in her luggage.

4) I want an iphone. However, it probably would not work here either.

5) Why are Japanese Cell phones so much better than ours. Don’t get me wrong, they are just as much evel about it as we are, all the phones are locked down to specific companies, but they are much more capable. For instance, with the phone I was using I was able to use the phones camera to scan Kongi (the Japanese / Chinese character) and it would translate them into English, or vice versa. Show me a phone in the states that can even come close to doing that! They almost all have built in currency exchange calculators and financial management assistance, and some go so far as to have a built in TV and / or radio tuners, all the while being only slightly larger if not the same size as what we have. US Cellular is holding out on us. (OK, this one has nothing to do with going to Guam)

Fugu Gump

Fugu… all the same thing. I went to Tokyo with the sole purpose of having a taste of this far east delicacy. Difficult to find, expensive, and potentially deadly all make this a bite to remember. It takes years for a sushi chef to become qualified and licensed to serve Fugu. A license is issued and national standards are set to qualify. A slightly wrong slice can prove deadly for whoever eats it. The exam is so difficult to pass, on 1-3 percent of those who take it pass.

My experience with Fugu: Unfortunately for me I read the Wiki article about it before I tried it. I read in great detail the manor in which the poison works and how it kills. See, it is a type of sodium blocker, as it takes effect it paralyzes the victim, losing all muscle control, yet not affecting the brain in any way. Eventually it shuts down the respiratory system and you suffocate to death, all the while totally aware of what is happening. There is no cure, if caught in time the only treatment is to place you on life support until the toxins are naturally cleared from the body. It also goes on to tell you that the some of the most toxic parts of the fish are its skin and its liver. Oh yeah, cooking does not reduce the toxicity of the poison.

I ordered the full course of Fugu, if I was going to do it, I was going all the way. 1^st course, Boiled skin of Fugu Salad. Wait a minute, I though this was something I wasn’t supposed to eat???? After the first bite my lips and tongue were slightly numb and I decided both the taste, texture, and thought of eating boiled skin fish was not very good. Did I mention I couldn’t feel my lips or tongue? Well, if they are willing to serve it to me, I am willing to eat it so down the salad of skin went.

One dish down… what next? Fugu Sashimi. Raw slices of the thickest, meatiest areas of the fish served raw over rice with a very nice soya sauce. Rating….. excellent. I really liked this and could have had several more servings.

NEXT! Grilled Fugu with vegetables. Another excellent dish. It was a bit more of a challenge than I anticipated though. Unlike the sashimi that had no bones, these pieces most certainly did. I think of myself as adequate with chopsticks, but I had never tried deboning a fish with them before this night. It didn’t go so well, and feeling sorry for me the waitress brought fork and knife which I eventually broke down and used (only when I had to). Hey, wait a minute, this piece looks different, waitress what is this? Oh, um liver of Fugu?? I didn’t think I was supposed to eat this either. Oh well, if they are going to serve it… and wow, so far the liver is my favorite part!

Are my arms starting to go numb???? Hard to tell, I should probably slow down on the beer just in case.

On to the next… Boiled Fugu Stew with vegetables.

This was very cool. All of the tables (all 4 of them) had induction cook tops built into them. The stew is made in a paper lined basket, right there at the table and served as each piece is ready.

Hold on, is that more liver, ohhhh two more pieces?!?!? Umm, ok. May I have a cup of green tea please? I think they were pulling livers out of other fish to give me so much, these pieces were huge compared to the size of one fish! Again, the liver was the tastiest. How could this be bad for me????

Boiled Fugu Stew rating…. Not bad. I think at this point I was starting to suffer from a little Fugu burn-out. One slice she was particularly proud of, “This is the face of the Fugu.” “The face?” pointing to my face. “Yes, the face.” Yummy, I ate the face of a fish. Again, back to the knife and fork to pick out every bit of Fugu Face goodness.

Here ends the feast of Fugu, the last two courses were a rice and egg dish, made in the same water the Fugu was boiled in, and an ice cream with tea for desert. As I was leaving the manager handed me a card with the restaurant's name and in large print across the top FUGU. I think the card was meant to be stapled to my head in the unfortunate case I stop breathing. Do it again…. Absolutely, but next time I am taking someone with me. I suspect the course I ordered was portioned for at least 2 if not three people to share.